Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Anyone else feel this way?

Sometimes I feel like a janitor. Well, maybe sometimes isn't enough....maybe it's most of the time~ anyway...the other day I changed a particularly foul and hideous diaper. The kind that would make most dads run for the hills screaming incoherently. (you know the kind, right?!) I had no sooner washed my hands and disposed of said mess, when Dennis, displaying his most Dennis-like attributes, informs me that he has peed all over himself and the bathroom...yippee. Clean-up in the restroom...only I'm the janitor. (sigh)....I send the little man to the tub...scrub the bathroom, get rid of the wet clothes, wash my hands yet again...only to hear a scream from the kitchen. What now. Miss B has decided to make herself a snack of Instant Oatmeal and upon retrieving it from the microwave, the bowl wobbles, and yes... spills all down the oven, seeping maple-flavored goo-iness into various nooks and crannies....and sliding all the way down to the floor and rug.

Here are some images that correlate...



Just look at that face, he can't help those nasty diapers....


In between cleanings....


And I'll say it again...good thing he's cute!


My assistants.


* two days go by*

I wake up in the night to feed the baby and step on something cold and squishy...you'll never guess....a HOT DOG! Either Dennis is up to his old tricks again...or hot dogs can climb out of fridges, walk up stairs and lay down at the edge of my bed! It wasn't a pleasant feeling. As the day progressed, I cleaned out Mr. C's goober-encrusted pink eye, washed my hands...and toted around an unhappy little Q who had been suffering from a cough and congestion. I was gathering up some laundry with my free arm when Q started coughing and proceeded to throw up all over the clean laundry, himself, me and the floor, only to discover yet another mess in the bathroom and a soaked Dennis...apparently he has regressed from this post. Oh well. I clean up the floor, throw the once clean laundry in the dirty hamper, wipe down Q, send Dennis to the tub and scrub the bathroom. Seriously, I don't think I get paid enough, because that doesn't even count all the REGULAR stuff. And I don't even have a cool uniform.

For more thoughts on kids and clean, visit this hilarious post of my sister's.

10 comments:

  1. hahahaha...this was hilarious! I needed a good laugh! Thank you! I know what you mean for the most part...just 2 infants tho pooping, spitting up, throwing up, exploding out of their diapers...etc...i love this post!

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  2. Isn't that the truth. I am laughing so hard. I know the feeling. It is a good thing they are cute, or else it wouldn't be worth it :)

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  3. Man, you and your sister are so funny. I can't stop laughing. Its so true though. I have just one and yet still I understand. I usually make circles all day long around the house cleaning this and that..probably cleaning up the same thing ten times. I often wonder why I signed up for this..then I remember, that for some reason its so worth it.

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  5. Oh the life of being a mom!! The funny thing is we wouldn't trade it for anything else. :)

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  6. After 10 consecutive days with someone or other having a stomach virus, I HEAR YOU! I'm ready to do some type of chemical burn treatment to the whole house and start over. --Tatum

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  7. I am just amazed that you actually get around to cleaning it all. After the 10th diaper for the day and the ?? spill - I just figure it is easier to clean once it is all dry!

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  8. E, I'm sure I can work out some sort of cool uniform if you thought it would make you feel better.

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  9. LOL!!! I laughed my TAIL off at those piddle-pants Dennis debacles along with the hot dogs, oatmeal and vomit soiled once clean laundry! I'm sorry, though. I know it totally sucked for you. :(

    Who is this Dennis that you speak of anyway? If he is a neighbor kid, I'd be tripling my rates!

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  10. Awesome, to read, not to live through! You're a great mom, and a terrific janitor ;)

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